« on: July 01, 2009, 11:27:56 PM »
1. Register at a forum of your choice. Choose your username wisely. If in doubt, just take two random words and combine them. Be sure to misspell both. Ex: Suparmang, FloarMawp or JiantBawls.
2. Make an introduction topic using countless ellipses and many pointless sentences. Summarize in three paragraphs what you could have summarized in two words. Check back every three minutes and bump your thread to ensure it reaches multiple pages.
3. Find the forum's spam board. Ignore it. That place is most likely already saturated with useless threads. Share the wealth with the other boards.
4. After being berated by countless members, finally create a thread in the spam board. Describe how you love your favorite animal and point out how you believe the opposite sex are robots.
5. After once again being berated, leave the forum and vow to never come back. However, do not delete your account. This is to ensure the success of a future step.
6. Join another 20 forums and get banned from 30.
7. Come back to the original forum and make an unnecessary return thread. Point out how much others have wronged you in the past and you hope things will be different this time. This is done to capture the pity of other forum-goers and make them feel sorry for you, thus putting you up on a pedestal above the rest.
8. Continue replying to every single thread as if nothing had ever happened, regardless of whether or not you comprehend the subject at hand. Fellow members will applaud you and respect your valued opinions.
9. Single out the 10 members you hate most on the forums. Create a thread titled "my 10 favorite members."
10. Learn to react. This is done by watching the way others reply to a comment. The fastest way to learn this skill is to quote the other person, making sure you contribute nothing else to the thread. The other person will see that you agree and thus realize that you are in fact the better man.
Bonus Step: After completing the above guide, you're now on your own. Remember, you're a veteran member now, so feel free to post about absolutely nothing!
Congratulations! You are now a professional forum-goer.
|
Post Author
Topic: How to post like a Coolydud: 10 Hot Tips For Forum Newbs (Read 3320 times)